Through Her Eyes
Why did my dad, Paul Gaines embarrass me this way – by dressing and carrying on like some demented drag queen? Why?
That was a question I asked myself for the last six years, ever since Dad went through his “changes.” He tried to explain to me that he – she that is – was a woman inside named Pamela. It was who she needed to be. But I was too young, to selfish, and too scared to admit what Dad – or Mom as she asked me to call her – was saying.
So instead, I was surly, disrespectful, and just rude to her at times when she was showing me what
cute dress she bought or where her boyfriend took her for a romantic dinner. I would just roll my eyes. Finally, she had enough.
“Justin, I’m tired of your attitude. I wish you could see things through my eyes. Hmmm… I have an idea…”
I told my Mom that the only reason I would do this was to get a car for my 17th birthday. But somewhere along the way… I found myself really getting into being Jessica. Into being a pretty girl, going shopping with her mom, talking about life. Finding cute clothes for both of us. Hearing her talk about how wonderful Clint made her feel. I found myself vicariously living through her accounts of dancing with him, walking along the beach, and those kisses!
Then, one night Mom and Clint introduced me to Eric, his nephew on a double date. And after few weeks, I couldn’t stop talking about how perfect he was.
Mom just laughed and gave me a hug and kiss. “Not bad for a couple of demented love struck drag queens, huh Jessi?”